I don't know why, but when I start spouting about something, other things come into my mind. I've had so little time recently to be able to take stock of whats happening, and to enjoy the ride that I'm on, rather than just be aware of what work I need to get done and what I need to do, and who I need to see etc... I really have felt that I've been lacking in appreciation recently. And I just wanted to stop. To be able to give thanks. It says in Phil4 v6&7:
"Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be known to God; and the peace which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus." (NKJV)
I had just simply forgot to thank God for the things, maybe thats why I haven't been feeling close to God. We looked at Peace in small groups the other day and this verse was talked about, it is a command, not a request, Paul realises that we will all feel anxious at one time or another, and it is therefore 'when' not 'if' we do feel anxious. And the thing about supplicating God by prayer is interesting...in the NIV it says petition which, to me makes more sense, in that whenever we get worried about anything, we can hand it over to God, and the amount of times we worry about one thing, is the amount of times that we can pray about it aswell. I once heard that meditation is similar to worrying, its just that we don't focus upon the negatives (worrying) but chew over a thought from the bible (meditating). I've kind of way gone off the subject that I was going to write about, but hey ho!
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I pray, O God, that I may know You and love You, so that I may rejoice in You. Let the knowledge of You grow in me here, and there (in heaven) be made complete.
(Anselm, quoted in John Piper's book)
I think we miss opportunities when we're on the highs - opportunities to let more than that partial knowledge of God grow.
I was thinking last night it was one year this weekend since all the stuff with Jess started, and it makes me feel ashamed that now, considering where we are, that I don't come before God and worship and thank him as much as I should. Meditation on all God has done...definitely needed!
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